A self-reflection on Youth

This is a piece prompted by a song that I’ve searched out to listen to the day before yesterday on Saturday. It’s a Mandarin song and my rough translation of the song title is “Betrayed Youth” even though a more correct one would be “the Youth we Turned our Backs on”, which seems too much of a mouthful. 

Anyway, for the purpose of context, here’s my manual translation of the chorus:

Would you forgive me? My arrogant youth

Running blind

dancing in the dark 

The boat you jeer at will dock 

Would you forgive me? My youth that lacks for my companionship

The greatest pity is that you use the last distance

To witness my restless departure 

Full of apology 

….

Would you forgive me? My arrogant youth

Running blind

dancing in the dark 

The boat you jeer at will dock 

Would you forgive me? My youth that lacks for my companionship

The greatest pity is that you use the tactful distance

To safeguard my anxious departure 

With no return date ever 

Would you mock me? My childish youth 

Arguing with wooden swords

Falling because of dignity

For the things that I cannot back down on 

I never let go of even if I had to gnash my teeth 

Would you forgive me? My youth that I have turned my back on 

How much have I compromised

among the packed crowd

Until I have not gotten anything 

Would you forgive me?

Would you forgive me?

My passed away youth 

So actually before this song I had been reflecting a bit on my youth and I’ve come to the conclusion that mine isn’t the typical youth, at least not the youth as portrayed in popular culture- full of adrenaline and passion, characterised by youthful follies, a ruthlessness in pursuing dreams and a high degree of self-centredness. Mine, like my life overall, has always been a calm and ‘lukewarm’ existence. Maybe it’s my personality or my own unique take on life, but I didn’t really go through a youth rebellion phase when I was actually a youth and instead had a rather late onset of it coming on in my 30s. 

Anyway, I don’t think I’ve ever regretted any of my youth. While I think this song might be more poignant for those who have, I feel like it is really about making peace with your past which I think everyone can relate to.